Hi Peeps! Spread Positivity!! :)

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Reasons Portland aint so grand....

I know my hatred for bridges does bias my opinion a teeny bit, here in the "City of Bridges".

However, tonight, as I tried to ride the train across a bridge to see my daughter in the hospital, I had a panic attack, and had to turn around and go home....
I discovered... Tri-Met... Portland's public transit...
So normal from the outside.
No wonder it's so much cheaper than CA's Metro....
On the inside... Like this:
Except drunk and disorderly.
Or dealing drugs.
Or vomiting or urinating.

Makes going over the bridges.... Fun?

Here's kid in the 1st E.R.
And here's view from first hospital:
Which weirds me out.
When my dad was in the god-forsaken hospital built on a hill overlooking the river (here in Portland),
this was the view:
But they took excellent care of him....

Here's an update on my piggies:
They're loud.
They have terrible behavior.
I don't even think they like eachother.
It's like family...

And finally, back in December (?) we had snow for about 4 hours here.
I got stranded at work, did I mention this?

Yeah... that charming little corolla.... would NOT move once hitting the mean icy streets of PDX...

My boss recommends I find an apothecary and get a tincture to help my anxiety for crossing bridges.

I've ALMOST finished my rug...

I MADE that shit.

Oh.... And I've become a full-on vegetarian... But I doubt I'm gonna lose any weight over it.

Love you guys!

Friday, February 26, 2010

No Awards here

Well, the crazy news is: child has entered an inpatient psych hospital.

I keep saying it's the best thing and that we FINALLY got her help.

Of course, I cried a lot tonight. She kicked me out of visiting her.
I hafta drive over bridges to see her, thru an hour's worth of traffic.

I know that doesn't mean a lot to an 11 year old.

She just wanted to get back to the kids to watch Barnyard.

She demands I come all the time, but insults living with me. (I'm "mean". It's so laughable. She gets away with everything, just because she's such a tyrant and everything MUST end up her way. She TOTALLY is like the Queen of Hearts. I'M Alice.)

I know it's not personal.

I hope everything turns out okay.
It's just hard to see lights at ends of tunnels.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Happy P Day

My bf sent me an email to work of hilarious pix like the one above.

My direct supervisor picked out the one above and sent it back to me with the title:
"This is SOO YOU"

Everytime I look at it, I can't stop laughing.

Laughing is a rarity these days.

Child has turned into serious split personality. I can't even say bad things today because today's personality was the good child.
I can only pray the doctors will catch on and get her the help she needs.
Local law enforcement only encouraged "physical discipline".
It's not that I don't want to beat "physically discipline" my child... It's that it's ineffective.
I'm relying on prayer.
My dad bought/mailed us 3 books about children with defiance problems, etc.
Boyfriend read all 3.
Much to boyfriend's dismay, we already DO all the techniques in all 3 books.
Why don't the techniques work?

Try to be happy.
Spread positivity.
Don't eat meat.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Fillin In

Here are some texts from recent past:

Me: The verizon fios guys came by to say hi.
BF: What?? They were like "We're from Verizon, just wanted to say hi" ?
Me: Ummm Yeah... Just tryin to sign people up...
BF: Who does that... that scenario only happens in bad porn movies... you better not fuck them!

Kid: Mommy! Sombody stole my bike!!!!
Me: OMG, that friggin sucks
Kid: I want a new one NOW
Me: No
Kid: I'm going to throw myself in front of a car if I don't get a new one NOW
Me: I'm saving that text for the doctor

Strangely, I don't think I've let on how much I hate bridges. Have I mentioned the paralyzing panic attacks?
And F Kaiser right, because I can't get into a psychiatrist to save my life.
I hate heights. I hate water.
Here are some pictures of the beautiful, nature-oriented city I CHOSE to move to:

I requested trees
It's like God's cruel joke....

In other news, the child may be bi-polar also, hence explaining the hellraiser-similarities.
However, it may be a mental hospital making the final diagnosis, seeing as how i have KAISER and they'd rather see you DIE before actually treat you.

My dad's coming in April.
It's not soon enough.

I'm still trying to get rid of chemicals.
I only have one last bottle of toxic cleaner left.
Everything else is being cleaned au naturale.

My work is trying to kill me.
I think I'm not cut out for work.
I've always known I'm not cut out for LIFE.

Oh, but I still want another kid someday.

Stay tuned in future for crochet yummyness

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Not back for long

Hello world.

The past few months have FLOWN by.

My father is down in California, waiting till March to move back up here so he can make my life miserable with his stuff E V E R Y W H E R E....
But in the meantime, he left my daughter and boyfriend to carry on in his name...

The above pic is what you may find on my boyfriend's side of our bed on any given week....
Today I posted that pic on my facebook and Boyfriend flew into a humiliated rage and cleaned it up...
"Clean up" meaning just throwing most of it away.... Not ALL of it.
Let's not kid ourselves.

My life is being swallowed by dirt and mold.I don't have the energy to keep up with the amount of dirt output these things/people are throwing at me.

I've been reading a lot lately. This is a good thing.

I've read ALL of the Percy Jackson books.
I read "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" and "The Queen's Fool". (An AWESOME book)
I continuously check out books out of the local library about sustained living.
I've developed a fear of toxins and dangerous chemicals in everything. I mean EVERYTHING.
But not THAT big a fear obviously. Still usin the Comet. Still eatin the red meat.
All in due time.

I will leave you with an awesome recipe from the book:
"Clean Naturally. recipes for body, home and spirit. by Sandy Maine"
Eucalyptus-Mint All-Purpose Disinfecting Soft Soap for Kitchen and Bath
5 cups grated castile soap
1/2 cup baking soda
1 teaspoon borax
6 cups hot peppermint tea
1 teaspoon eucalyptus essential oil
"Put grated soap into a 3-quart stainless steel saucepan and add hot mint tea. Simmer for 15 minutes on low heat. Add baking soda, borax, and eucalyptus oil. Store in a labeled plastic jug or squirt bottle. Shake before using."
"Can be used for washing dishes, floors, stoves, refrigerators, sinks, and hands. It's mild to the skin but effective enough to get cleaning jobs done. The eucalyptus and mint provide a disinfecting quality as well as a fresh scent. Any areas washed with this soap will be undesirable to crawling insects and flies--they'll stay away for quite a while."

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to figure out how to save our money so I can get to Whole Foods. P.S. Trader Joe's let me doooown! (They had NO organic body washes!!--Even Target had some!!!)

P.S. Boyfriend's jumped on the baby-makin train. I think he's just bored and wants a friend.
So far we've got Sylar for a boy and Calypso for a girl.

Ok ok, he's not really on board with the name Calypso, but F him, this is my blog.